Sunday, April 28, 2013

You know, this month, I read your post, and realised how much of our life is wound up in our daughter. Not that this is a bad thing, but it has taken a bit of a toll. It is difficult to spend time together when we have both a 50kg foot warmer and a high stim baby.

But we must persist. Even though I am doing my best to make sure I get cross because you are trying to take more than your share of the burdens. I should be a little more appreciative I know, and I’m trying (more than just a little according to you).

It has been a long month, very long. And not neccesarrily in a bad way, but maybe not in a good way either. We’ve been at the end of a very worn tether this month, both of us. And I just want you to know, now, in retrospect, that I’m not as cross with you as I might have seemed.

I know that doesn’t make much of a difference now, but I wanted to tell you anyway. It’s been a hard month, and try as we might to spend time just being with eachother, it seems as though timing has not been on our side. But we keep trying, and that’s the important thing. We will get some time together, alone, without the dog… eventually.

On the other hand, I have noticed how amazing you are this month. Admittedly, in some of those cases, that has been because you have pointed this out. But fair play, I probably should have noticed well before that time. Like housework. It wasn’t until you rather forcibly suggested that I should help you with it that I realised how much housework we actually generate. And I’m not normally contributing more than a little. You, my wife, are incredible.

I did try to put in a little more after that. And I would hope that I at least succeeded in being a little more helpful and reducing your work load a little more. I know I should be doing more, and hopefully by doing that, it will give you a little more time to do the things you like to do.

It was great, however, that this month, we had more time with no TV and more music. Which meant that my bad white man dancing skills came out a little more with Genevieve in the living room. Now, I would like to point out that we should be living this up now, seeing that as soon as she can tell me how silly I look, I’m not sure those dance moves will see the light of day until the next child.

All in all, this month was hard. But we’re good, Genevieve is good, Reuben is good, everything is okay. And sometimes, okay is perfect.

Love You


Saturday, March 30, 2013

So this month had it’s share of ups and downs…. We went away, which was great, until I got sick. And not just mild “I feel crook” sick, but the I cant get out of bed kind… So that could have gone better, but I did like that the place we stayed was awesome, even if I say it myself…

When we were away, I only realised at the end that it was the first real ‘holiday’ that we have had, the 4 of us… It was great though. Its so nice to spend the time away from the crap of the city with all of you. I only wish I was healthier for the experience. We have, however, made the decision to extend our stay by a week next year, which will be even better.

Also, I tried to be generous this month…. I know, try not to be too surprised, I’m not trying to set any records here. I tried to give you ‘time’ to do what you would like to do. And I think it was appreciated. Which was great. I know you do a lot around the house, and it’s been a very trying few months, and I appreciate you… So therefore my attempt at giving you some “you time”.

I also just want to point out that things have been a little difficult this month. I would like to say that it has been because of chaos theory, or the world spinning a little differently, but unfortunately, I think I have just been a bit of an ass this month. Sorry.

You know, this parenting thing isn’t as easy as it looks… And not because of the baby. All of a sudden we have 2 full time relationships to concentrate on. And it’s hard. Time is fleeting, and grey hairs are apparent. And all of these things are difficult to deal with. But I’m glad to have you with me to go through it.

Pain in the ass thought I may be.


Wednesday, February 6, 2013

And we're done......oh wait, what do you mean this is only the beginning???

So, my beatiful wife.....
I believe, quite possibly, that I might have missed a few weeks of letters that I am sure you are due. In fact, I definitely, without any doubt, know that as fact.

First, let me apologise for being so tardy with writing this post for you. I could explain it away as 'I was working so hard' or 'I tried, but couldn't get started', but the truth is just that I forgot.
And what a time to forget to post something. I know we have both been so overwhelmed in the last 3 months or so since I last posted on this blog, with you know.... this and that... But seriously, what type of an excuse is having a baby?!? Who puts that out there? Weak really isn't it? I can't take out the rubbish, I can't do the washing up and I have so much to do… (Just take this one as an admission of guilt)

Can I say however, that you were amazing. I don't for the life of me know how you ever got that little (well she looked a little smaller than I imagine she felt) thing out of you. I apologise for almost passing out. Can I say though, I would like to emphasise the word ALMOST. I would like to say something in my defence, although considering our individual parts in the occasion, I don't think it's a great idea.
So we had a baby! Wow, that was full on. As well as the giant furry beast at home, the amount of time out and about in that week, and the fourth night in hospital, I think you and I did great. And we made it home. Just. I can't say that it got easier, mainly because that would be an abject lie, although we coped.

At least Genevieve saw fit to relax us as soon as we got home, although I think I might have to have a chat to her about that. Projectile poop is not generically the most appropriate way of relieving tension in the room. Funny, but most definitely not appropriate. And then we were on our own.
So the last 9 weeks have been a rollercoaster. From gas, poop, pumping, more poop, crying, more poop, more crying, and everything else, I think we have fared very well. She has slept, not slept, eaten, not eaten, leaked, not leaked, you get the idea. I must say that through all of this, you have been amazing.

I'm sure there exists somewhere in the ether a 'super dad' who can cope with everything, work six full time jobs, and do all the housework without losing his s@#$. I am not, unfortunately, that man. I am the damaged, strange, unique? individual that you married. And thank God you knew that before we had a baby.

I'd like to think that we complement each other, and that has led to a rather productive parenting unit, or maybe that’s just the way I like to justify the fact that I don’t get up for the night feeds. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that by the way. I don’t often just acknowledge how many things you do around the house, and that really should be better addressed on my part, so I thought I would mention it here as well. To be honest, I don’t know how I would do as a stay at home dad. We’ve had the discussions, and I like the idea, but really, I couldn’t do what you do, I don’t think (that’s a compliment, by the way).
And how have we fared through all of this? Well, I wouldn’t say that we came out completely unscathed, but we’re still married, and talking, and have all of our limbs intact, so that’s a plus in my book. I know we’re not always so ‘friendly’ with each other, but we know we’re in it together. Yes, admittedly sometimes that means we are up the creek without a paddle, and it seems that I might have possibly used them for firewood, but you always manage to have a spare. I know Genevieve is lucky to have us both, and we are lucky to have her, and I am eternally grateful to both of you for letting me be a part of all of this.
So, we’ve gone through a bit already, and it has only been 2 months. I don’t know what the future holds, but I’m thankful that our little girl has you for a mum, and that I have you for a wife.

Your faithful idiot Husband

Tuesday, November 6, 2012


Now I know it's been a long time since I have found the time to get on here, and write a post for you... It's not that you're not important (because you are), and it's not that I don't have time (because I could find it if I put my mind to it), and it's not that I haven't wanted to (because I have).

Really, when it comes down to it, I haven't posted because I've been lazy. Just downright lazy. Sometimes I think I'm trying to do so much to make things ''good'' and ''right'' I forget to do them with you... And as much as they may seem the same, with and for don't quite come across as the same things to you.

Like the personal training... Now I'm glad I did it. Feeling fitter, better about myself, and a whole bunch of other benefits that I'm so glad to see. But as you may (or may not) have pointed out (diplomatically, of course), I might have been something akin to a right twat while i was complaining that you, in your insignificant pregnant state (sarcasm, just in case it's less than obvious), wouldn''t possibly be able to comprehend the exhaustion that I was experiencing, you were good enough to just sigh deeply, and let me waffle a little longer.

I also know that recently, with a second job, and my favourite of all activities, painting..... yeah, right.... I may have not always been the most cheery, welcoming, nice, kind, easy going, patient, husband. I do however want to say that I appreciate, more than you will know, how much you have to put up with from me. I don''t know, nor do I ever want to, what it is like to carry a 9 pound bowling ball under my shirt (and unless in desperation, and stupidity, I decide to rob a bowling alley one day (although why I would take a bowling ball and not the cash...well...), I hope to never have to).

You are my rock, my Peter as you may put it. I appreciate, and respect you, much more than I probably will ever say, seeing as my memory is... shall we say s#$%? I just wanted to write you this to say I know you're a bit worried, very tired, not looking forward to finishing work, and a whole bunch of things that I don't understand at all, but you're still my stunning, level headed, dedicated wife, and I'm here for you (whether you like it or not).

I hope you get a chance to read this, because in the end, I''m not a great writer, but I like to write to you.

Always yours

Your Husband

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

After a small Hiatus... (or awwwww, it's Valentines Day)

So, I'm back......

I won't tell you I'm only writing this again because I have so little to do at work, the prospect of beating my head against the closest hard item sounds like the most intellectually stimulating thing I will do today....

Because obviously I am only back on here and writing is because of the deep emotional bond that we have, and the fact that it's valentines day I love you dearly......

So, what have we been up to???

I count 18 months, a new house, a small horse, and more challenges than I can (or should) poke a stick at.... You know that whole thing about not poking a sleeping bear/dog, whatever.....

So it's been a while, and I would like to start with a sincere apology to you, my wife, for neglecting my blogging responsibilities, and for seeming like I may have dropped off the face of the e-world.

Sometimes, I must admit, I find you a little frustrating...... I mean, I was sure that all of the ultra irritating things I do were just meant to be part of your punishment reward for marrying me. I could have sworn that was what the for better or worse was meant to be about in the vows, right? Your better and my worse? Although in retrospect, I think I may have possibly got that one a little wrong.

In all seriousness though, I don't know how you do it.... Now I have a rather unique perspective on how..."challenging" I can be sometimes. You know, me being me and all. And I do, on the odd occasion when I have mental clarity, realise quite how much you have to put up with. And I appreciate it.

I've been thinking lately about where we go from here. Someone told me the other day that it was nice that I hadn't 'given up' on doing nice things for my wife, and I thought... do I really want to get to the point of giving up on that?... Just to confirm, I did decide that wasn't something I wanted to give up on.

So I've made a decision, and one that it may be a good idea if you were aware of... I have decided to try and live closer to that honeymoon period, when things were a little more carefree and 'fun'. 'We', and by we I mean we, should be able to act like kids, at least until we have them, a little more. So, I solemnly promise to fail miserably a whole lot at making that happen, in the hope that I will sometimes, in between the irritation I cause, cause just a little bit of that fun, happiness, and that smile that I remember so well from the 7th of August 2009.....

Happy Valentines Day

Your Husband

Saturday, August 7, 2010

It has to be noted.....

.....One Whole Year.....

You know, it's been a year....
No, not since I started writing on this website, but since I got married...

And what a year it's been... I'm sure the last few posts have given you some insight into our lives over the last 12 months, and the... well, shall we say 'challenges'... newly married life has presented us with.

But for the first time in 12 months, we took the time to celebrate our anniversary with a nice dinner, wine, cocktails, etc. And we took time to reflect...

Here's a snapshot of our first year.............

  1. The wife was laid off as we returned from our honeymoon
  2. Our landlord kindly decided the best financial option for her was to sell up (not so great for us ...EVICTION...)
  3. After extensive searching, we both became employed again... YAY!!!
  4. After 5/6 months consecutively, we both then became unemployed again.... not quite so yay...
  5. The wife then found a better job, the one she is still currently in/enjoying
  6. I then spent 3 weeks in hospital (3 separate admissions) for a HEADACHE!
  7. I then became employed again, also in a job that is still current/enjoyable
So what can I say, it's been a ...challenge??

But on our anniversary, we talked about our first year, and how, even through all of that, we've grown together, and forged a bond that we both see as a building block to start forming the rest of our lives on...
I know sometimes it seems sappy/kitsch to hear couples talk about how much they love one another, and so I won't...

We talked about how things have been difficult, all of the tough decisions, the challenges in building a relationship and aclimatising to living as a married couple. But that through all of these challenges, we have come out stronger, more resilient, and closer than we could have ever imagined going into this endeavour together.

What I will say is that for anybody who may read this, or for my wife (who almost definitely will), I only hope that you will not necessarily know the trials and complications we have experienced, but will know the support, trust, confidence, and dedication that we have found through these experiences...

I only have one more thing to say....

To my loving/caring/generous/beautiful/graceful/honest/trusting/amazing/indescribable wife....
  • For agreeing to marry me
  • For putting up with my quirks
  • For not saying what I'm sure I sometimes deserve
  • For saying what I'm completely sure I dont, and
  • For never giving up on us...
As you said, you are the head to my heart, and the words to my song...

Your Husband

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Step 2

You're HOW OLD???

So, based on our last encounter in this blog, you would assume the worst... or at least that's what I would assume...

In life, we have our ups and downs, and downs, and downs, and a few more downs... I couldn't help but overhear the other day, 3 men at a bar having a conversation. Tits, beer, and cursing... So, sounds like a perfectly reasonable kind of conversation for a few men in a bar, yes??? But there I sat, passing silent (and maybe sometimes not so silent) criticism on my peers.

And so I had to ask myself... These idiots I criticize, you know the ones... people who can't hold down a decent conversation, can't drive without using the horn, push people out of the way because their life is far more important than yours... Am I turning into one of them??

A few years ago, I was that guy, swearing, perving, drinking, more or less of the impression that I would always be young and carefree, going where the wind took me, living life to the fullest, hour at a time kind of thing... Then something happened...

I got OLD........ really fast...........

Not that I know how this happened, and you would be incorrect that it was a reflection on my newly married status, but it happened almost overnight...

You know you've really got to start considering how old you're acting when you start hearing 'when I was that age' and 'what is wrong with kids these days?' coming from your own mouth... I've turned into my father... OVERNIGHT!!!

Now, I must admit, my father is not a bad man to turn into, he has been very successful through his life, and I would be lucky to turn out with half as many achievements under my belt by his age, but really?? When did I turn into an old man??

But we have to way up the pros and cons here... There are benefits to being in this situation, for example, I much prefer dinner parties to the blind drunk evening at the pub (not least for the fact that my bedroom goes from an hour to a minute away). Unfortunately, the cons are that nowadays, I find myself biting my tongue A LOT more... A couple of times in the last few weeks, I think I may have even come close to detaching it.

So maybe I have to try to hold my tongue rather than biting it, consider that the idiocy of youth is something that I am not all that recently removed from, and start to work on my "tolerance".

But for the meantime, we'll make the best of what life throws at us, and if life continues to throw good wine, good food, an amazing wife, and a marriage to stand the test of time at me, then hey... who am I to argue???

In retrospect.........
You know, I can look back on the last few years of my life, and commentate on how old I got, or how critical I have become, but I always fail to mention quite how much all these things are indicative (in a good way) of the new life I share with my wife.

I may be sometimes bitter, sometimes conceited, never modest, always highly strung...
But all of these things fail to taint the support and dedication I have behind me.... I may be getting older every day, but I have a woman that makes me feel as young and carefree as the day I met her...

I know this is a bit sentimental, but hey... us oldies have a tendency to get a bit sentimental every now and again...

'Til next time